It doesn’t matter which language you speak, words are one way we communicate our individual, thoughts, emotions, ideas as well as frustrations to get our point across or to get our way. No two people choose words the same way, there’s different meaning, or intention related to a persons state of mind when words are spoken.
With 500,000 words available within the English language you’d think the average persons vocabulary would utilize a good portion of words right? However did you know most peoples “working vocabulary” consists of 2000? What’s even more shocking is the average amount of frequently used words is between 200-300! Think about how many words you use during the day keep track, you’d be amazed how many words we actually speak each day.
Today we’re all trying to get more done in less time, which is why for the most part people don’t focus on the size of their vocabulary they understand but the words they frequently use. Each one of tends to choose words which have may have a meaning that relates to a past experience. The result can be the same words being used over and over again.
Words we choose each day become our reality, they can express our emotions good or bad. Unconsciously we choose a word which expresses our emotion, this can have an effect on our internal biochemical response to that particular word. For example if when you become frustrated you say “I’m pissed off” you will only become increasingly more angry, if instead you replace a few words and say ‘I’m a bit peeved you’d have a different internal biochemical response.
In my personal life I experienced the importance of choosing words which would not add to my frustration. I learned this from one of my mentors who had coined the phrase, “Transitional Language.” During my construction days there would be meetings at the start of a project, we would sit down and go over what was needed for a productive installation. One day, my supervisor, project manager and I went into a meeting to discuss what we needed for that project, however not everyone sitting around that table was in agreement with what we needed to get started, in fact it didn’t matter what we asked for no one agreed to work with us to get us started, I became quickly frustrated and angry, my project manager began to raise his voice while my supervisor sat there quietly and listened.
After the meeting we sat down and went over our options, at this point I was very frustrated, he didn’t say hardly a word, when I asked him he looked at me and said, Steve it’s really not worth getting that upset over this, that’s not going to solve the issue, period. As I looked at the project manager his face became red with anger, I’d thought to myself there’s going to be harsh words spoken and maybe an all out shouting match. At first I thought my supervisor didn’t care but after he explained what was going to happen next it made sense, I guess that’s why he was the super and I wasn’t.
I thought to myself this was an interesting situation with one person ready tho fight, the next looking to resolve the issue through the use of words. No matter which direction we were going the destination was not a common ground. It was from that point on I realized the importance of words. If the super had reacted in that meeting instead of communicating with others in a calm and even tempo approach, the result may have been different.
Today I am much more aware of the words which I choose to describe a situation or potential issue. Words which we choose to describe a situation become our future reality.
In life if we constantly choose words that are congruent with our emotions, we can actually alter a negative emotion to change and become a positive emotion. So choose your words carefully.
This week begin to think about what you say and become sensitive to how they make you feel. Notice which words you use as a common word to explain, anger, frustration and lowering the negative language. Pay attention to your self talk. With a few changes in language your future reality becomes a place of positive experiences!
~Stay Strong~
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